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The Birds got it right.

Sky St. John — Wed, 21 Oct 2009 20:15:19 +0000

My gym is on the second floor of a hotel and on the lanai, where the dreaded ab-crunchers are, you can see right into the tops of the palm trees planted down below. Between my tasteful grunts, I spotted two doves sitting next to each other on a gracefully drooping frond. I watched as they lovingly groomed each other and huddled close in the morning coolness (it was 5:30 am…).
“Remarkable,” I thought, as I noted that one was pure white and the other grey and black all over; “their color means nothing to them.” I tried to see which was the male and which the female (making the usual hetero-sexist assumption), but couldn’t tell the difference. Not in their bodies, or in their behaviors. Granted, I’m not an ornithologist, so maybe their gender subtleties escaped me. But maybe, too, like their color, they weren’t relating to each other on the basis of gender traits. They just were together, enjoying the moment, being gentle and caring, sharing their life.
In these respects, I think the birds got it right: color doesn’t matter. And maybe all the other stuff doesn’t matter, either–age, sex, economic status, caste, religion. It looked to me like the real joy came in experiencing their togetherness and the affection that was passed so freely. I guess what matters is the love that is shared; as one of my favorite Fred Small songs says at the end: “And the only measure of the life that you live will be the love you leave behind when your gone…”

Illness, Consciousness, and Father Damien

Sky St. John — Tue, 25 Aug 2009 18:39:02 +0000

There was an article in yesterday’s newspaper, about Father Damien and his impending canonization. I worked in Kalaupapa over a two-year period as a nurse, so I was interested. Damien has long been one of my personal, spiritual heroes, which is why I wanted to work in the colony; I wanted to serve the same people he did, lived where he did, and walk the land the way he did.

I started to think about Damien’s life, and the fact that he succumbed to leprosy (or the now more correct, Hansen’s Disease), most likely as a result of his close contact with those he ministered to. I teach that our bodies are the outworking of our consciousness and that perfect health is a Divine Idea—God’s flawless vision of who we really are. Disease, then, is most often seen as a defect or something that needs to be healed. This is tricky for me because it involves my nemesis: judgment. Somewhere along the way, the collective “we” have judged “disease” as a bad thing; a reflection of some area of our consciousness that is in error. I think Damien’s life teaches something else.

Father Damien loved his people with all his heart and soul. I can imagine that he wanted nothing more than for them to know a deep connection with God and each other. I can imagine that he must have felt some separation from them, first, as a “haole” (Caucasian), and then as a “well” person.

Richard Marks, a resident of Kalaupapa, told me the story of how Damien revealed his illness to his parishioners. He began his Sunday homily with the words: “We lepers…” He was, at last, one with his flock. What a great love it was that brought him to that place with such grace and wonder.

So his illness was actually a supreme act of love, an ultimate gesture of oneness. How then, could I call this a defect of consciousness? How could this be a manifestation of error thinking?

I have friends now who struggle with cancer and other illnesses. From now on, I refuse to see them as somehow flawed or unhealed. I’m going to look for the love, the reaching, lessons that their condition is bringing forth. I will see them perfect—at last.

Peace or passion?

Sky St. John — Thu, 20 Aug 2009 04:52:52 +0000

A good friend of mine who works at the Honolulu Zoo took a friend and me on a special “VIP” tour, yesterday. It was a real treat: getting to pet a great white rhinoceros, three-toed sloth, giraffe, and feed the hippos. All the while, the zookeeper shared some interesting facts about the various beautiful and often, endangered, species we were seeing up close. The sloth, this peaceful, sleepy and tree bound creature, does not possess the “flight or fight” reaction. Neither does the rhino. Actually, there are several species in which this sometimes-troublesome pattern is absent. And I noticed that their approach to us was unnaturally peaceful, unthreatening and unthreatened.

My zookeeper friend said that whenever any of the workers are stressed by their jobs, they just come into the cage with the sloth, and sit a while. Their perpetual peaceful state seems to pervade the area, and after a while, the humans come away restored and centered again. What an amazing thing, and what an amazing gift to be giving—unknowingly and yet powerfully.

I’ve been thinking today that I want to be more like that—a kind of peaceful presence that calms all who step into my “field.” And yet as soon as I write that I know that I also want to be the kind of presence that energizes people and generates a kind of happy renewal in their souls. I understand that there is a definite relationship between our closeness to God–the experience of joy– and that the inner pathway to that relationship is most easily achieved through an avenue of peace. Maybe we get to the genuine exuberance of life by way of the stillness.

So should one path be the ending of the journey? Do I want to be peaceful all the time? If you know me, you know what the answer is. So I think it’s a cycle of grace that we are on: we dive deep into the peace, find the joy, live in genius and passion, and then cycle back in gratitude, to the peace. Confusing? Maybe this is the peace that passes all understanding…

Aloha from Sky

Sky St. John — Mon, 17 Aug 2009 03:01:09 +0000

I can’t tell you why I’ve felt compelled to begin this blog (I mean, don’t I have enough to do?). But I have. Maybe it’s because I believe that the internet is like the central nervous system for the whole planet, and I am trying to live in a way that at least gives the illusion of connectedness… So, I’m connecting.

As a minister, there were some important decisions I had to make about this mode of connection—mostly deciding what I didn’t want to happen. I didn’t want to assume the mantle of “enlightened leader” and expound on spiritual topics in some pseudo-academic fashion. I also didn’t want to be an ambassador for my church and use the forum as a way to advertise upcoming events and plug my special interest causes. So, a little clear about what I didn’t want, what did I want?

Well, three things jumped out for me: honestly, integrity and authenticity. Like all people, I just want to be real and known for who I am.

I get it that people tend to put ministers on a pedestal—a very dangerous and lonely place to be—and this might be a disillusionment for them. I’m sorry; I really am. But I really don’t belong up there, so let’s just try and be comfortable with me down here, with you, on the virtual patio.

So what’s this about? I guess it’s about a man who is passionate about his life calling, who loves what he does, is deemed successful and yet still has to deal with the everyday challenges of existence. I suppose this blog is for those who might be interested in seeing how I cope with life–for those who might want to feel somehow “closer” to me. I truly honor that. Ultimately, I guess that’s why I’m setting aside time every day to make this electronic “share.” Deep down, I want to be closer to you, too.